Day 213
GPSers Do Not Reinvent The Wheel
Ignorance is not bliss, it is dangerous, and we need to know more than less. Domestic Violence is just one of those issues and today I discovered an interesting and seemingly helpful site - Bible Studies on Domestic Violence. Giving it a glance I can see it covers the bases, so I have included the introduction. You will then want to view the entire 40 page document. While you are at it, check this out also- Abigail's Support Group for Women with an Abusive Partner. It is helpful information regarding your Internet History and what you should do for your safety's sake.
There are many women and men in our lives who have yet to understand the complexity of this issue. Though the script, typical for domestic violence, which I say is straight out of hell, lacks in creativity it makes up for it in deception, an insidious deception. The enemy loves to pit us against our brothers and sisters but we must and will resist. We must commit to endeavor to love one another even when we see each others' blind spots. WE ALL HAVE THEM.
Where is God in all the domestic violence going on? Does He really care? Yes!
Because God not only cares, but loves us and wants to preserve our lives, His Word
includes instruction and advice about domestic violence.
One of the places we find this is
in the story of King Saul and David in the book of 1 Samuel, in the Old Testament. The
story of Saul and David provides a study of the patterns often seen in cases of domestic
violence.
Domestic violence is a pattern of misuse of power and control used against a household
member or intimate partner. It is an attempt to coerce, intimidate, and control through
emotional, verbal, physical, sexual, financial, religious, or other means. Domestic
violence is more about power and control than about gender.
The domestic violence we
see King Saul carry out against David is between two males, yet it shows many of the
patterns typically seen in spousal abuse today.
The story of Saul and David helps us to understand what goes on in domestic violence
relationships.
Even if you've already left such a situation, this portion of 1 Samuel can
help you to:
Deal safely with a domestic violence relationship
Understand what may have happened in a past relationship
Protect yourself in future relationships
Teach your children to recognize and respond to domestic violence that might
occur in their future relationships
You are encouraged to read ahead through chapters16-26 of 1 Samuel. You will see that
Saul showed many of the characteristics frequently seen among domestic violence
abusers, including:
1. Blames his abuse on David, the victim
2. Has history of not taking responsibility for his actions, and using excuses
3. Narcissism (the world revolves around him and what he wants)
4. Extreme jealousy
5. Controlling, watches his victim's every move
6. Likes to bend or break the rules and defy the "system;" is rebellious
7. May lie or not keep his word
8. Repeatedly abuses, asks for forgiveness, then repeats the abuse
9. Becomes obsessive about David and stalks him
10. His religion was mostly an outward "show" to impress others
11. He twists the intents and meanings of others, and sees evil in others' motives
12. Lacks empathy, and a willingness to sacrifice others to get what he wants
13. Is insecure
14. Uses his position or power as a license to abuse
15. Had difficulty loving his son
16. Probable trauma or generational sin in his upbringing (see Judges 20)
17. Can at times seem "possessed" or "out of his mind"
As you read these chapters in the Bible, you will also see that David‟s experiences
matched those of many domestic violence victims today.
David:
1. Tried to appease his abuser and had to "walked on eggshells" around him
2. Found that all his efforts to appease his abuser and avoid violence didn't work
3. Grew up with abuse in his family of origin: his brothers were abusive to him, and
father treated him as inferior
4. Found that some people were not willing to believe he was being abused
5. Was stalked after fleeing his abuser
The story of Saul and David has much to teach us about dealing with domestic violence.
We have a God who provides wisdom from His Word to meet our every need (2Timothy
3:16) and who has promised to teach and guide us (Psalm 25:8, 9; Psalm 23:3)!
My son, Christopher'sSun.
Original,
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