April 24, 2016 From Hurt to Love
Hurt is murky muddied waters with a lack of clarity. When I am hurt I am in a fog of emotions barely able to see form and structure only blurred lines. My arms stretch between ropes as I blindly find my way over the cavern of unknown sources and triggers. In the early morning, today, I ask Jesus to show me the bottom line of the hurt. He does. He is good.
Jesus gently leads me to understand the source of this particular hurt. I am an includer. I love to include people and when I can I do. The hurt comes when it is not reciprocated and when something I have started is taken with no reference to me, no thank you, just a grab and go.
Jesus in answering my plea, is revealing to me the form in the shadows, the murky waters, clarity to my hurt. I now know what I need to ask forgiveness for and repentance from. He does not stop there.
In the murky waters Jesus begins to take shape. He transports me to the glory days of creation where He delighted in creating all things for you and I. I identify with this delight for I love projects and I love people. I love relationships. I love Jesus' heart for all of this. He speaks to my spirit, "Lynne, everyone took what I gave them and used it for other purposes never thanking me or even throwing a glance over their shoulders. They grabbed and went. You are experiencing what broke my heart. But it is well with your soul for I am yours and you are mine. And Lynne, you have done this as well. But I still love you and always will." He calls me to more repentance and I am more in love. His ways are higher than mine. He always raises the bar.
He further calls me to remember my advice to my children: I encourage them when hurt, wronged, left out, excluded, to feel it and be thankful. For this end of the stick is where Jesus's heart resides. Likewise, I encourage them not to be at the other end of the stick; the traitor, the excluder, the rejector. Our goal is to grow in love and understanding not in reaching the top. It all circles back to Him.
He leads me to a greater, deeper love while the blurred lines focus, the steam rises, and the fog lifts. He smiles at me, arms outstretched. He never hurts and always includes. It is His ever loving way. He asks me to do more of the same regardless of the outcome for it is well with my soul.
Note to self: Always ask Him to reveal the source of hurt in the murky waters, the fog. He will do it. He is good.